Journey of a Soprano

Monday, 20 March 2017 There's a lot to be said for the cloud which still lingers over mental health, not just here in the UK or back at home in Australia. Sometimes I don't even see it as lingering, but more smothering to the point that a lot of people shun the idea, run away from it, or even bury and hide it. And that's just the people who are suffering... Media campaigns fight to unshackle the stigma, and get people talking. Posters adorn GP clinic walls. Badges are on bags and lapels. Pamphlets are stuffed into holders. And yet, here we are. Even with all the info, and a pamphlet in the back of my baby's Red Book, I still remained oblivious to the fact that what I could be driving a hard bargain with every day is another branch of the Black Dog. (Trip Advisor: 2* - mattress is pretty good, but disappointing interiors and a questionable breakfast buffet. Left me mind weary.) I'm still a bit unconvinced that Postnatal Depression (PND) is definitively my i...

Sunday, 12 March 2017 It's been quite the time between writings. Much has happened. Many maps have been traversed, pages turned, dog eared, smeared, pencil markings in the margins, chapters closed, and new ones begun. Even now, approaching two years on from the miscarriage, there are still days where it hurts. It's fresh again, and weeping around the edges. It traverses each cycle of the moon behind my eyelids, in that darkened space, healing but never forgetting. In September 2015 we were blessed with a second positive pregnancy test. We didn't dare to hope too hard. After being lulled into a false sense of security by all the symptoms the first time, it was impossible to relax. Every twinge, every tug, every wave of nausea on my morning bus trip, every painful ligament stretch could mean everything or nothing. I obsessively checked for blood, and yet was still afraid to breathe when nothing appeared. We had gone in for a reassurance scan at 7+6 weeks to make sur...